Rashunda Miller Reed, PhD, LPC-S, LMFT-SC
1921 Corporate Square Dr., Ste B. * Slidell, LA 70458 * Ph: 985-265-7701
Please note that counseling services are only available in Louisiana (in office & virtual).
Systems is a specialized approach for counseling couples and families. Systems approach is different in that the focus is on all members as opposed to individual functioning. Rarely, is any one person the problem. The problem can be better understood by exploring how, when, where, and to what degree couples and families relate to each other, or their interaction patterns. Interaction patterns can be problematic, such as when one partner is overinvolved and the other partner is disengaged. Interactions can be intentional, such as when partners negotiate or they can assert themselves while preserving the relationship and one's self-worth. The first few sessions are dedicated to getting to know the system (couple or family) by creating a genogram which is a map of interaction patterns for at least 3 generations. Couples and families of all configurations are welcomed.
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
IFS, created by Dr. Swartz is a framework for doing parts work with couples and individuals. The ultimate goal is be more of your Self, which is characterized by the 8 C's: compassion, confidence, courage, connection, calmness, creativity, curiosity, and clarity. Ever said a part of me wants to... That's how this model works. Thoughts, sensations, emotions, and other things that you experience in or around your body are parts doing their job. Most people try to ignore or override these parts. IFS is a transformative approach for appreciating all your parts so you feel less burdened, weighed, down, and shamed. Parts usually want to protect you, they just go about in unhelpful ways. Some parts have been with you for a long time and have things they want to share with you and things they need to hear form you. You can also visit the IFS Institute Webpage.
Discernment Counseling, created by Dr. Dougherty is not really counseling. The ultimate goal is for couples to choose a path and walk away with more knowledge of what is needed for future relationship building. It is a service for couples and individuals in which at least one partner is leaning out (considering divorce, leaving, or separation) and another partner is either leaning in (wants to save the relationship) or leaning out as well. This service is limited to 1-5 sessions in which partners recognize their contributions that complicate the relationship. By session 5, you would choose one of the following paths:
Path 1: Keep things the same
Path 2: Separate or divorce
Path 3: All in 6 month commitment in rebuilding the relationship with divorce/separtion out of the plan.
This service can be helpful regardless of which path is chosen, because there is greater clarity on what partners need to work on for future successful relationships. No change is expected.
Q & A
Is counseling for crazy people?
Forget that myth. Counseling is for anyone wanting growth. Like many other things, some people stop counseling before they see changes. We get that. It's not only an intellectual process, it's an emotional one (i.e. curiousity, pain, shame, doubt, or strain).
Visualize the thing you want. See it, feel it, believe in it. Make your mental blueprint and begin-Robert Collier
If my relationship is in trouble will counseling help?
Maybe. Sometimes couples outgrow each other or ignored red flags indicating they were not a good fit. It is important to quickly address changes and challenges in relationships through effective communication so growth and healing can occur. Counseling is not necessary for everyone. If you want your relationship to work, do all you can to preserve it. At Relationships Matter LLC, we believe that relationships and marriages can be healed. Marriage refers to anyone who has an emotional romantic connection (Schnarch in The Passionate Marriage).
Nothing will work unless you do- Maya Angelou
Is low self esteem really a thing?
Yep, at Relationships Matter LLC we help you get to know you and your parts. Over time you may learn to value others more than yourself, or vice versa. Even people who are considered talented or successful can have a part that struggles with self-worth. This is especially true if their self worth is linked to internal or external factors beyond their control. We help you to appreciate yourself and others by developing goals that fit your specific needs. Affirmations, prayer, community, money and so forth are helpful, but may not be enough for some people. There is something different and deeper about being able to confide in another person who is 100% dedicated to helping you unpack, repack, and revisit wounds as many times as necessary. No amount of external learning can tell you who you truly are. We help you look inward.
Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken-Oscar Wilde
What if I don't make progress or don't like counseling?
It's okay. Change is simple, but not easy. Sometimes counseling is like sifting through shit. The process stinks. It's not always fun, easy, or cheap. Setbacks are expected. Forget the scripted counseling you see on television. There are many ways of counseling. At Relationships Matter LLC, we are counseling. Counselors maintain the same integrity in and out of sessions to promote client welfare. Together, we will figure things out.
Start where you are, do what you can, use what you have-Arthur Ashe
Are you concerned that counseling or counselors may not be a good fit? Ask for a complimentary 15-minute discovery consult to help you decide. The consult is not counseling, however, it might be helpful.
Slots are reserved for couples and families on Saturday. Say yes to counseling without anyone having to miss work or school.
Couples, families, and individuals outgrow their challenges sometimes. Other times help may be desired. Counseling is a reasonable expense for resolving mental and emotional exhaustion. See rates below.